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how can I help someone stop the cycle of sexual abuse?
jim burns

I will go through Psalm 139 with her, but she has almost given up on God. She can't believe that anyone can love her unconditionally. She even received an abusive phone call while I was counseling her at her home. She was absolutely distraught. How can I help her stop the cycle of abuse?

The unfortunate thing is that you really can't force her to get into counseling. Pushing too hard, may not be the thing that we want to do with her. She needs to want it in order for counseling to be effective.

As for the phone call, is the abuse still on-going? Does she still have contact with the abuser?
If the abuse is still on-going, by law you will need to report it. You are a "mandated reporter" even as a youth worker. The time limit for reporting varies by state. However, if the abuse is still happening, or if you even suspect that it is happening, the best thing to do is to report it to your local child protective services. And if it has never been reported, you will want to do that as well.

As for her image of who God is - when it comes to abuse, it is so difficult to help them see God in the midst of the ordeal. They ask, "So where was God is the middle of all this." That's a great question. What she needs is for you to continue to be the incarnational love of God in her life - to love her unconditionally and seek to walk with her through all this abuse. What she needs is someone who will love her as Jesus loves her.


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